I'm 19 right and there is no way I am thinking about having a child anytime soon. Mostly because I'm not married but also because children are expensive. Someone once said that it costs more to have someone born than to have someone killed. Either way I don't have any money. However, I may not be having kids but my sister in law is and I got the wonderful opportunity of being her birth photographer.
In high school, I saw the Miracle of Life video in my medical terminology class and I thought I had seen it all. Also I was kind of turned off by child birth because I watched it with 30 immature high school students. People... I can tell you now that my thoughts in high school are completely different now! This special moment in this little hospital room was the most beautiful thing I had ever witnessed. I kid you not, on my drive home I cried the entire way. My sister in law, Jordyn, was so strong and breathtaking; she is seriously a rock star. When I saw Sully (short for Sullivan) I cried, and when I held him for the first time I cried again. Babies are such little miracles and bringing them into the world is an even bigger miracle. 
Sullivan James Clark came into the world at night (can't even remember the time because I was so excited) on April 7, 2017. He weighed 7 lbs 2 oz (which was what I guessed so I got extra babe snuggs) and 20 1/4 in. He is so so perfect and I am so lucky to be an aunt to a baby boy!! Reagan is the best big sister already and she knows just who Sully is. She played doctor today and wanted to check everyone's heartbeat while she wore her doctors gloves. 
Our family is growing and I'm so excited about it! My heart is so so full. I cannot get over how beautiful Sullivan's birth was and how much my Heavenly Father loves my family. I can already tell 2017 is going to be a good year.
I will also be posting on my photo blog the labor pictures so make sure to check that out in a bit.
xo
​Holl

Remember 9 months ago when I was still a fresh high school graduate and had no idea what was going on. Well its been 9 months and I'm not a fresh high school graduate, but I still have no clue what's going on. 
I made it. Two and a half semesters of college, a lot of soda, bad food, adventures, boys (cringey), and good friends made for a great year at BYUI. So I finally get to go home and see my dog and my mom and my dad and the whole farm. To be perfectly honest, I've never been so excited to be home. Getting to see the beach and mountains and trees is my lifelong dream as of recently. Have you ever lived in Idaho? Let me tell you, my skin is always dry and I've used up so many tubes of chapstick. Don't get my wrong, I love Idaho, it's really neat and such but seriously, Rexburg is every single season in one day. I survived a -28 degree windchill by the way, so that's neat. Actually that wasn't neat at all, it was awful and my jeans stuck to my skin. 
Enough about the weather, lets talk about my friends. I met the coolest friends and coolest creative people! I worked for an online clothing boutique and got to take great pictures for them, I got a job at the BYUI Store where I was a social media coordinator, and I took cool pictures for so many fun and creative people. Rexburg has been so fun and I suggest that everyone visit it at least once! 
Basically it wasn't super fun to stay in Rexburg every weekend, so my friends and I always left and adventured to new places, mostly Utah.... yeah mostly Utah. We went to Jackson, Wyoming a couple times and it was so fun! I am in love with that little town and could go there all the time. From watching hockey games to eating good pizza, it is seriously the best. Utah was fun too. I went to Provo mostly to visit my sister and my brother in law. I saw a few friends down there and met cool new people! I spent a lot of money too............ but still had a lot of fun!! Also, I dyed my hair blonde so that was fun. 
Besides the fact that I loved Rexburg and my time so far at BYUI, I really learned a lot about myself while studying here. First of all, my first semester was pretty tough. School was challenging and I liked that. High School was hard but not challenging, and I liked my love for learning here. I took a nutrition class that taught me more about my body than I had ever imagined. There was a 7:45 science class in there somewhere that I showed up to 60% of the time and still passed so very thankful for that. After that I had aerobic fitness techniques where I learned how to properly exercise, teach others how to exercise, and set up my own workouts-- I don't have to rely on another plan anymore. Let's not forget about that math class I took and didn't learn a thing. Most importantly I took a religion class. New Testament was one of the most rewarding classes. I'm not always super intellectual in the Gospel and I know that I need to grow and learn in that, but my New Testament teacher always challenged me to speak up and share my thoughts. I learned how to become better through a Christ like characteristic and spread that to others. I met a great friend in that class too who was full of kindness and knowledge and challenged me to be better. However, school was easy, dating was not. I dated a few boys, got some pretty good stories to share with people (ask and I'll definitely tell you), and found some that I actually liked and what I like in someone. It was stressful and the boys here are crazy. I found that sometimes you don't have to search for something, it may be right in front of you. 
Second semester was sooooo easy. Maybe it was because I took easier classes with a lighter load, but that's not what I thought when I signed up for them. My first class was foundations of freedom and civil society which was a very interesting class! I loved it, was challenged and learned more about the world and political standings than I thought I would. The science class I took was super easy and I didn't really have to try hard to get an A. I thought I wanted to be a Communication major (still trying to figure that out) and took two Comm classes; Public speaking and Intro to Communication. Those two were easy. The teacher I had for my Public Speaking class rarely showed up. In the beginning, he cancelled so many times that we only had to give two real speeches so that was real nice. Comm 100 was easy because you had to show up and do the assignments and there was never homework. Finally I took the craziest religion class ever. I took Pearl of Great Price which is basically a temple class. There is so much to the temple and my teacher has been everywhere and done everything. He has traveled to exotic places and learned so much. He would often share crazy stories and go off on tangents that essentially I had no idea what was going on. It was such a great class and has gotten me so excited to do work in the temple in the future.
Oh yes, dating.... I didn't date this semester. No one really asked me on dates anyway so that was nice. I spent my time with friends and focusing on myself. This semester I moved to a new complex. There I met my favorite and best friends. I had the best roommates! They were so kind, fun and welcomed me into their friend groups. My room roommate is the best person I know. She is so kind and funny, loves soda and brownies, and is always down to do something fun or stay in and watch movie. Together we watched the entire Twilight Saga and Harry Potter. There is no one else I would rather quote She's the Man with. 
I grew so much in the Gospel this semester because I focused on myself. I believe that my Father and His Son are paving the way for new and better people to come into my life, but I have to be patient. Patience is hard for me when it involves long term. Nevertheless, I pushed through this semester despite many dates, which was a big turnaround since Fall semester. I focused more in Tuesday devotionals, started expressing my feelings through a pocket journal and typography, and recorded my thoughts and testimony as often as I could. I still have no idea what I'm doing, but I know who I am and who my Savior and Heavenly Father are. 
College isn't so bad people. You have to find the right people that uplift you and make you better. Make sure you don't fail. You have to try to fail here. Learning isn't so hard. We all want to do something, but we have to take the necessary steps to get there. 
I'm so excited to be home and work on myself, my photography, and spend time with my family. I've never been so excited to be home. I took for granted the beach and the mountains and I know to never ever do that again!
Fall and Winter semesters were perfect and I'm so excited to experience them all over again, continue to work on my spirituality, and find more people that groove with me. 
xo
​Holl